Hey Kat....
There, I told you this was a fantastic place didn't I!!!!!
I'm so glad you're here!
individuals wife
JoinedPosts by individuals wife
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28
still resisting!
by Kat_ inthis is my first time on a message board relating to anything jw.
i haven't posted anything in the past because i still held to the fear that it would be betraying what i was taught, betraying my family, betraying god.
this is precisely my life as it is now.
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Wife of Jehovahs Witness
by Totally lost inhello, i married a wittness in 98. although i do not believe that way.
i thought that i would be able to deal with the religion.
but as it turns out, i can't.
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individuals wife
Hi again Totally Lost,
Your last post makes me believe that you are starting to take more control and not feeling quite so totally lost as you were when you first came here.
I am so glad that you have somewhere where you can go and take a breather, take a break away from all the tension and concentrate on yourself. It sounds as though you have good support in your parents - don't feel like you are 'burdening' them with your problems though - I would hope in years to come that if any of my kids came to me in a similar situation (God forbid..) that I would not see it as a burden, just part of being a good parent.
I hope you find some happiness in your life, you certainly deserve it after all this. Take care and safe travelling.
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116
most embarrasing thing ever at a meeting ...
by alliwannadoislive inhey ... i'm just getting into the swing of this great 'apostasy' thing right ... ?
... i thought y'all out there might well have a story or two to tell, so ... plz tell me tell me tell me about the most embarrasing thing you ever saw at a meeting ...
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individuals wife
must be joking, or may I call you mike?!
Is the list JWs, ex JWs or a mix? Not had time to look around yet
You'll find a huge variety of characters in here, at all different stages of 'JWness'. That is what makes it so interesting, pull up a comfy chair and have a good look around!
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Oh, and as I'm in a 'most embarrasing thing ever at a meeting' thread I had better add my own personal red-faced occasion.....
I was at the meeting once with my son on my lap, must have been about 2 years old, didn't realise until later whilst I was walking about after the meeting was over that he been undoing the majority of my blouse buttons. Talk about blush!!!! Why didn't anyone tell me??? -
116
most embarrasing thing ever at a meeting ...
by alliwannadoislive inhey ... i'm just getting into the swing of this great 'apostasy' thing right ... ?
... i thought y'all out there might well have a story or two to tell, so ... plz tell me tell me tell me about the most embarrasing thing you ever saw at a meeting ...
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individuals wife
mustbejoking - a big welcome to the board first of all!
They proceeded to eat the fish and chips and even cracked open a can of Coke during the second half of the meeting.
Absolutely brilliant, would have loved to have been there - thanks for giving me a huge belly laugh! Maybe not quite fishes and loaves but almost!!
Good to have you with us.
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13
falling in love
by kid B inok, heres my story.... i am 21 years old, male, and i am not a j.w., but i have hopelessly fallen in love with one.
unfortuntately, i do not believe what she believes in (i use the word unfortuntately because i wish i could believe, but i cant and it tears me apart).
i'm sure that this has happened a million times before, and you guys probably hear about it a lot, but i'm finding it very difficult to deal with, since she has also fallen deeply in love with me, but she feels like the only option is to let it go.
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individuals wife
Hi and welcome!
Just a brief tale of my experience, I met and married my husband when he was an inactive JW, not attending meetings but still very much a believer, he used to sit me down with the book of Daniel whilst we were courting and explain it to me.... how romantic!? The religion was firmly entrenched in him even though he had drifted away from the meetings, it still affected his life in a big way. As far as I was concerned I was not marrying a witness, just an ordinary man. I had no fear that he would go back in and that it might cause problems for us.
As it happened out this turned out quite differently, a few years down the line and a few children later, we had that knock at the door and a couple of familiar faces and before we knew where we were we were having a bible study, a refresher for my husband and a new experience pretty much for me. I was amazed by what I was hearing and never took the time to check their 'so called facts'. To cut a long, long story short, I ended up baptised and pioneering (70 hours a month on the doors).
Now, my husband and I have been out of the organisation since last November and have not looked back since, we will never return.
I suppose the point of my little tale is that I went into the religion, not for my husband, not to make him happy, but for me. I felt like I was doing the right thing at the time. Yet if I had done my research in the early days I would not have given the religion a second glance, it has so many holes in it, so many flaws and errors.
Do your research, get to know 'the enemy', find out exactly what you are up against.
PS. I hope you get your girl! I hate to see things stand in the way of true love, especially religion.
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49
30 and Out?
by Black Man in30 that seems to put jw's at a cross-roads?
i've known so many who have decided to abandon ship at either the age of 30 or either after 30 years of being baptized.
i fall into the former category.
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individuals wife
I threw in the towel at 29 years and 11 months! Is that close enough for you??
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Wife of Jehovahs Witness
by Totally lost inhello, i married a wittness in 98. although i do not believe that way.
i thought that i would be able to deal with the religion.
but as it turns out, i can't.
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individuals wife
Dear Totally Lost
You are in such a difficult position, my heart goes out to you, truly it does. It is so hard to see what direction to go in, I feel so angry with the organisation that has created these problems for you.
I wish I could wave a magic wand and take your pain away but unfortunately life is never that simple.I was just on my way to bed when I read your last post, just couldnt leave without letting you know that I am on your side and you have my greatest respect for all the courage you are showing by standing up for yourself. Take care, hopefully I will get to talk to you in the chat room sometime. Bye for now.
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28
still resisting!
by Kat_ inthis is my first time on a message board relating to anything jw.
i haven't posted anything in the past because i still held to the fear that it would be betraying what i was taught, betraying my family, betraying god.
this is precisely my life as it is now.
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individuals wife
Kat!!
Lovely talking to you in chat tonight! So glad to see your post here, its very moving. I hope it helps you to get it all down in writing..
Dont worry, you will be able to move on in time, but you have to realise that it will take a little time, you have a lot of healing to do, I'm just glad that we are here to help you.
I am so glad that you have been able to retain your faith, without the JW trimmings, you will find a real mixture of beliefs here which is nice.
My self confidence in finding my way on my own is shattered.
You dont ever have to feel like you are on your own, most of us here know what you are going through, lean on us and you will find good support.No-one will judge you here, telling you that you are right are wrong, some of us have suffered too much judgement from the society already and don't wish it to continue here. This is certainly a place where you can clear your mind and use us as a sounding board. Shout, cry, have a tantrum, laugh, do what ever you feel like doing......
Take care Kat and hope to speak to you again soon!
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20
Wife of Jehovahs Witness
by Totally lost inhello, i married a wittness in 98. although i do not believe that way.
i thought that i would be able to deal with the religion.
but as it turns out, i can't.
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individuals wife
First of all, let me say how sorry I am that you have been put in this awful position, it must be so very difficult for you. I think it is very sad that your husband did not take your feelings into consideration when he decided to go back in, I get the impression that he is very much guided by his family which is unfortunate. A man, especially a man with a family of his own, needs to make his own decisions and I get the feeling that he has been co-erced somewhat into this situation.
I can understand how mad you feel about the way in which his family now embrace him, yet not so long ago were prepared to shun. I hate this type of conditional love, to me it is not real love at all. I do not like to be told who I can and cannot talk to.
As for the blood issue, even when I was in the congregation I would never have let any of my children die because of the lack of a blood transfusion, they have always meant more to me than God. With the blood issue you are in a very difficult situation, if it was me I would be tempted to make sure my kids never carry blood cards for a start so if there was an emergency blood could be administered. Obviously if the need for blood comes up in a hospital situation where both you and your husband were present then there would certainly be a need for a lawyer. As for your own protection maybe you could carry a medical directive in your purse stating that in the event of an accident you do not want to be denied blood, maybe a similar document in your doctors file may be useful too. Maybe you could reassure yourself a little too with the thought that there are alternatives to blood and if the worst did come to the worst and your husband did deny your children blood then there are workable alternatives, lack of real blood is not always a reason for death. Lets just hope it never has to happen.
It sounds to me like you have a good ally in your step-mum, it is useful to have someone who knows what it is like to be shunned, and also someone who is aware of what the JWs believe and all the implications.
I am so sorry that you have been put in this situation, you must feel very betrayed and let down. I just wish I could look into the future and tell you that everything will work out fine, I have learnt after my experience in the JWs that you have to make your own future, life is what you make it.
Maybe a comforting thought is this - many people who go back into the religion end up leaving again quite quickly, my husband was in for 25 years, I was in for 5. We left for 9 months when we were having massive problems with doctrine and the attitudes of the elders. But we ended up going back in, maybe because we were scared of life without a hope of a new system, maybe because we missed some of the people there, maybe because we missed the routine and feeling of belonging. I dont know. But what I do know is that it wasn't very long before we realised we couldnt overlook the problems within the organisation and we left once and for last November. We almost felt that our time going back in just proved to us just how much we didnt really need it, hopefully your husband will come to the same realisation.
It sounds like you are a lovely person and I just hope that he comes to his senses before he loses his real family, you.
Take care - hope to speak to you again soon.
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Religous blackmail a deciet of trust.
by sennabrasil94 ini've been thinking, i was never a good jw as far as studing went, so i'm not the type to quote scriptures, and passages in the books and magazine publications put out by the jw's.
but i heard enough being around them and what ever talks if any that payed attention too.
it seems like they try to scare you into their group.
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individuals wife
It seems like they try to scare you into their group. Who else feels that way?
I would be the first one to put my hand up and agree with you there.
They use Armageddon as a tool of fear, either follow us and our beliefs or you condemn yourself and your children to death. And a nasty death at that. What religious blackmail that is.I believe that religion should centre on love and how to treat our fellow man, it should teach us about humanity and respect for one another, not death and destruction. Did the Jesus of the Bible teach by frightening people? No. I think the JWs are way off track.